tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19646581.post3386366819312799620..comments2024-03-09T02:32:34.549-06:00Comments on Dr. Melissa Clouthier: Self-Awareness & HumilityMelissa Clouthierhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15864991953502438461noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19646581.post-10581218050820440482007-03-08T20:55:00.000-06:002007-03-08T20:55:00.000-06:00You bring up a good point. Sometimes advice isn't ...You bring up a good point. Sometimes advice isn't meant for your benefit, but to harm. It takes discernment to know the difference.<BR/><BR/>Here's a weird analogy: when I was playing the violin, I had a great teacher, but eventually she recognized that I had gotten as far as I could go with her. So I moved up to a much more challenging and proficient teacher.<BR/><BR/>In life, as we move to higher levels, we need people with broader life experience, more insight and more precise recommendations. I remember an interview with Bela Karoli about coaching Mary Lou Retton. Well, she was just doing her routines herself and self-correcting. The reporter asked why he wasn't out there telling her what to change. Karoli said that she knew her mistakes when she made them and when she needed help she asked.<BR/><BR/>There comes a point of proficiency, I think, that it is incumbent upon the achiever to seek advice when something isn't working--and seeks advice from a wise coach. No one is going to tell Tiger Woods to change his swing. He has to decide he needs the help and ask.<BR/><BR/>And while Mary Lou might be a world-class gymnast and Tiger Woods a premier golfer, and need only tiny nudges to reach perfection, they might have a difficult time learning to relax, say. (I don't know them, I'm just using their lives as hypotheticals.) They would have to rely on the feedback of family and whomever else gives them good advice to help steer them in the right direction.<BR/><BR/>A lot of people worried about Tiger getting married--that it might hurt his game. But he also has a life he must balance. And this is the challenge for all of us--making decisions we can live with in the long term.<BR/><BR/>So, no not all advice is worth listening to. I tend to see people tuning out, rather than over-tuning in to honest feedback. And who doesn't have trouble taking advice from their mother? It's fraught on a good day.Melissa Clouthierhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15864991953502438461noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19646581.post-56959698158760063812007-03-08T16:18:00.000-06:002007-03-08T16:18:00.000-06:00Well you're on to something. I wish I could get m...Well you're on to something. I wish I could get more people to criticize me in my latest endeavors. I think people soft-soap their critiques with women anyway, like they think we'll burst into tears. Actually it's a great compliment for someone to take you seriously enough to take you on. I had to run for office just to get any engagement at all and maybe I'll just keep on running.<BR/><BR/>I admit tuning out a lot of advice from my mother because there seemed an element of rivalry in it. It was hard to separate the wheat from the chaff, and she had made a mess of her life. Do you listen to such a person or not?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com