GM: Would You Like A Back-Pedal to Go With Your Rear Wheel Drive?

Having been born and bred into a GM family (please don't hold it against me--I went to public school too so there you go), GM cars are to me what human bodies are to my kids. When the midwife asked the older two if they knew a pregnant lady's innards, they said "that's the placenta, that's the spine, that's the large intestine, those are the lungs, etc." Isn't nice to know that we're breeding nerds? But I digress.

Anyway, GM, and this will astonish noone, is stupid, stupid, stupid. A few years back, the genuises over there decided to get rid of a very hot selling rear-wheel drive Impala. It is a good-looking car, even today and boy could it move. It looked uniquely American. For those of you who think that's a negative, may I point you to all the bland-looking Euro/Asian sedans that all look like tight-arsed little silver boxes. GM couldn't keep up with the orders for the Impala. So the logical solution? That's right! Close down the line and discontinue all rear-wheel drive chassis because no one wants them anymore.

What?

So, like the ladies late to the dance yet again, GM reissues another rear wheel drive vehicle--the Camaro. Frankly, this company fatigues me.

Automotive News asks, "But will it appeal to new drivers?" Yes, you ninny-headed nincompoops! Who doesn't like a Rear Wheel Drive car? People loved it when it was discontinued! Let's see, it peels out, you can spin it, it starts fast and if the engine is decent it rumbles under your butt. While the Baby Boomers buy it for nostalgia, the younger set will buy it for the same reasons kids always bought Camaros and Impalas:
Fast, animal-looking, zippy and cheap (in comparison to high performance cars like the sterile imports).

Car predictions for 2006:

1. Boring bland BMW-ers are out and fun-color American cars in
2. Customization, customization, customization--people will do more and more as Pimp My Ride trickles down to the average Joe
3. Companies will perform, for extra dough, more customization off the line finding ways to do more colors and more other fun stuff efficiently