Saturday, September 23, 2006

Changing Her Last Name

Should a woman change her last name once she's married? That's the topic of this post. Here is my opinion: if you hate your own family, changing your name can be a welcome relief. If you want children and want it simple change your name.

The time when it seems good to keep your last name: when you're established in business and everyone knows you. A good friend of mine kept her family's name. She had taught for years before getting married, everyone in the community knew her, it was just simpler.

It does seem to me that name changing is one of the last patriarchal concessions in the modern world. Leslie Morgan Steiner says this:

Mostly, I changed my name because my feminist zeal had faded and it mattered more to me that my kids and I had the same last name than what that last name was (although gee, I wish I lived in a world where the man agonized over giving up his identity).
Ironically, it's the men who joke about "losing their balls" or being connected to a "ball and chain" once their married.

Personally, I went from one name no one could pronounce, unless they were from Scotland, to another name no one can pronounce. Sigh.

1 comment:

Christine said...

My husband and I changed to two last names after the wedding (not hyphenated, just two last names).

Boy has it ever been a nightmare!!! :) It really was a good shot and I'm glad we did it but we're transitioning over simply to his last name, which is now ours.