Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Gay Divorce: Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

If a married gay couple moves and wants to get divorced in another state that doesn't recognize gay marriage a couple questions arise:

1. Is there a need for divorce when the marriage doesn't count legally?
2. If the couple doesn't get officially divorced because the state didn't recognize their union, are they committing adultery by breaking the vow they made in the other state?

My solution is simple: go back to the state you got married in and get divorced. You knew that divorce was a possibility when you got married. Why did you get married again?

When the whole gay marriage issue came up to begin with I thought: Why the hell not? Let gays suffer just like the rest of America. Let them get married, intertwine all their earthly belongings and then suffer through the legal cost, humiliation and frustration should they choose to divorce. I was just being snarky, because marriage is, by definition, the union of a man and his wife and divorce breaks up that union.

Anyway, gay divorce is problematic and complicated by different state laws. I'm guessing that Massachusetts lawyers will be making a boat load in legal fees, not to mention filled state coffers due to making taxes off of disgruntled gay people forced to stay there or move there to disintegrate their union. Ha! Looks like the same old people win, even in gay divorce.

2 comments:

silvermine said...

I had someone bring this up as a reason we need a federal law about this. But they seem to be missing something -- marriage laws for heteros already vary from state to state! In some places it's a 50-50 everything shared state, in others not. Kid's custody is very different from state to state.

Personally, I think epople should draw up an actual contract instead of expecting them to just use whatever the state has, and have the agreement change when they move! How ridiulous is that? It doesn't require federalizing it -- just formalizing it into a real contract that both parties agree to.

I think everything would turn out better that way. (But then, I also believe in non-romantic civil unions. Like those two old spinster aunts who look after each other. Or a friend of mine and her brother.)

sandy said...

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