Idol Hatred--Live Blogging The Cursed Event

I hate myself for watching American Idol.

Paula Abdul is drooling as usual. David Archuleta singing "And So It Goes" by Billy Joel. My favorite Joel song. Shit. And he's starting a cappella. He's kicking it. What a soaring voice this boy possesses. Simon sez it was predicable but not outstanding. Randy calls it "dope" and Paula felt he "told a story".

Syesha is going to do Alicia Keys. Randy Jackson chose "I Ain't Got You". I love Alicia Keys, but ouch for Syesha because she doesn't have the depth and passion of Alicia Keys and it's obvious. I want her to go AWAY. Why is she still here? She does look gorgeous. Meh. Goodbye Syesha. Let's see what Randy says she's "peaking at the right time". Syesha needs to go home, but I bet she stays because the boys split the vote. Ugh. Just go home.

David Cook will be singing a Roberta Flack song "The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face". Wow, incredible song. Let's see what he does with it. He's kicking it. Dahum. He's hurting me with this song. Shit. He just won the whole thing with this. He needs to be thanking Simon for picking this song because it's off the hook!

David A. will be singing a Chris Brown "With You". He's doing great. My son is singing along enthusiastically. It must be good. My reaction? OK and I'm hearing Rick Astly again. Bleh. I'm ignoring the judges.

"Fever" by Peggy Lee, huh? Well, Syesha is ambitious I'll give her that. Cute little dress. She's lookin' adorable and sexy. Again, the song is too big for her, beyond her. This song is meant to be song by a woman who has made her way in the world, right? Syesha is too much a little girl. And now she's just annoying me. Randy likes it. I agree with Paula. Simon says that he thinks she'll regret the song--Cabaret. Yep. Blech. Buh-bye Syesha!

American Idol just makes me mean. And you know what I'm thinking during the commercials? No, you don't know. All I'm thinking is: hurry up! I want David Cook. I want him to sing to meeeeeee. Now! And I have to wait through stupid commercials and two twits singing for the real superstar! Back: Hey babeeeeeee!

Bring it, David! Switchfoot's "Dare You To Move". Ambitious choice, David. Everyone knows this song and it's still popular right now. Ooooo and he's playing his guitar, too. I'm not liking it. What in the hell? The chorus is better, he's feeling it now. Let me predict. Randy will say it was "pitchy". Oooh, surprise, he didn't. Not the best choice, I don't think.

For the second round all the performers chose their songs. That was a bad idea.

"Longer" by Dan Fogelberg for the midget. I'm kinda sleeping. Of course, he can do this and do it well. My daughter gives it the it's-kinda-ok hand move. I agree. He's putting me to sleep, but that's the song. I'm snoring. Randy says that it's a good one vocally. Paula says "lovely". Simon says it's a song for a 90 year old. Amen. I'm still snoring in the rocking chair.

Good song, Syesha is doing average. But you know what? In a studio they'll tweak her voice and she'd be fine. She can't hold the note. Her voice is all friggin' over. Yuck. No one likes it. My daughter says, "but she's still pretty though". Well, there's that.

Sigh. David Cook comes on strong at the end, finally, but up 'til then, blah. The crowd loves it. Randy loves the song, but the performance was "predictable". Paula Abdul says he's going to the finals. Simon says that he wins the night. I think so, too.

I like David A. more watching at the end. I like Syesha even less. And David Cook is a star already.

And there is one more hour of my life I'll never get back and I regret it and I knew I would.