Friday, March 31, 2006

More Sex Less Brains Better Blog

An early reader clicking through my blog said I'd get more readers if I posted about sex and would get even more if I showed pictures, too. So I posted a post on sex lives to temporarily satisfy my insatiable readers.

This link, via Seth Godin of Purple Cow fame, goes to Scott Heiferman's blog where he lists 50 reasons no one reads your website/blog. This got me to thinking. Uh oh. You see, I'm plateauing at the 50 readers/day level. I'd like about 5000/day. Let's do some math. If each discreet reader got 10 friends hooked, who got ten friends hooked........oh my goodness! Watch out Daily Kos! A little self-awareness might be necessary. So, I'm going introspective here as to why I haven't gotten over the hump, so to speak.

One problem, he says could be "college words" or writing above your readership. So, since I am not interested in the gazillions I invested in higher education going to waste, I'll just put a dictionary link to any word my kids (ages six and eight) don't understand. Solves that problem.

Another problem is the "no sex thing" and the "no sex-celebrity thing" which is related to the "you're a complete dork thing". Well, I'm sorry people, my interest in celebrities runs from completely disinterested to not interested at all. Every now and again, one, like Tommy-Boy Cruise, will get my attention and I'll give an opinion about their weirdness/plastic surgery/political views/closeted gayness/cult membership, etc. Most of the time, I really don't care about them or the fashion that clothes them, either. But for those who are desperate to read my take about popular culture you can go HERE and HERE.

So why should you read my blog? There are better political blogs, no doubt. There are better, more rigorous scientific blogs, no doubt. There are better business trend blogs, no doubt. There are better humorist/satire blogs, no doubt. There are better futurist blogs, no doubt.

There is no place, however, where you can get ALL of the above in one capsular format AND, and this part is free too!, possess an informed opinion about it too!

My sister, who reads a newspaper only under duress, would read this blog if she realized how smart, informed and up on the current events she would be if she only took five minutes of her day to stop by. That she doesn't stop by daily only reveals a lifetime of accumulated passive aggression and/or she doesn't like any post that is longer than two sentences. Either way, it bugs me, when a week late, she says, "Did you hear that there were Mexican Marches last week?"

"Uh, yeah! If you had read my blog......"

This statement now cause gales of laughter amongst my extended family. I try not to let the humiliation get to me. I'm a blogger, I have no shame. In fact, I don't care if Harrison Ford (the old leather cranky pants) hates my guts. And if you don't know what I'm talking about, IF YOU READ MY BLOG......

YOU'D ALREADY KNOW.

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